A Red-Letter Day

So, I was informed last week by the father that I have overdrawn from the bank of minutes. The cell phone minutes. The ones that cost 40¢ each. And there was about 2 hours worth of them taken.

I am sad.

But it's not my fault.

"Oh, Justin, but it is," you say.

Now, while it may be true that it's my phone and I can choose when and when not to talk on it, it's not my fault that some people call me before night minutes start (Which, oddly enough is 9 PM and not 7 PM). Nor is it my fault that those who call like to talk. So, obviously, it's simply not my fault that those minutes were used.

I'm just sayin...

But yeah. He didn't agree.

Sadly, all the money earned at the high school soccer game I refed last weekend went to pay off said debt, so I made nothing. But I have learned a valuable lesson: Night minutes start at 9. And they're free. No matter what.

I got to see Monty Python's Spamalot. For $20. Oh, and got lunch and dinner. How much better can your Sunday night get?

Seriously, though, Spamalot was hilarious. I would say it was about half from the movie and half extra stuff. Of course they had classic scenes such as the killer bunny, the black knight, the Frenchmen, and the Knights Who Say "Ni" for starters, but it was sprinkled with new people and new goals (Making a Broadway play?) that kept it fresh for those of us who've seen the movie more times than we can count... It's highly recomended for anyone who needs something to do and isn't lame. Oh, and those who like Monty Python.

Hung out with Chris, Ben, and his girlfriend for the whole trip, which was pretty cool considering I signed up for the trip thinking I was going to be by myself. I would have been lonely...

And of course, the trip included dinner, which consisted of them sitting us down at E&P and saying get whatever you want. Which we did. Plus a little bit more. And did we feel bad? No. We're college kids... That's what we do. Eat. Especially when it's free.

In conclusion, Spamalot and all you can eat E&P = good. Oh, and not by yourself also = good.

Spamalot get a big ol' fish slappin' A.

Now, some of you are probably going to hate me for this post, and that's OK. I recommend that if you are reading it and become angered, you should stop reading it. Please don't consider me a heartless person, as I am not and I will hopefully outline that as I go.

So I came home last weekend for the first time this year, and made my second trip this weekend, because of homecoming. Now, what was the first thing I noticed as I arrived in Weirton, the town that doesn't change? Everybody and their neighbor has "Kick It, Kristin!" bumper stickers. Everybody. And their neighbors.

Now, for those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, here's the situation. Kristin, over the summer I believe, was diagnosed with cancer. Which is tough; it's horrible, don't get me wrong. I'd never wish that on anyone... I sat by as it killed my uncle, and if there was a magic way to get rid of it, I'd be all over it. So don't confuse this post with me wishing her ill or anything like that. It's quite the opposite; it's unfortunate that it happened and I wish her a speedy and painless recovery.

But on to my problem. Everyone's had a huge turnaround about Kristin. Now I remember growing up with Kristin; she's two years younger than me and lived down the street. She was best friends with my sister and thus, at that age, hated my guts. But that's OK, cause I, being a rambunctious 8 year old or whatever age, was mean to all my sisters friends (That's why none of them liked me). But soon enough, like all girls, they started to hate each other. And of course, the parents get involved and there was a general hatred between the two families (Well, with the women at least). But I was fine with that... We basically had to deal with two "rival" families throughout my younger years, and I always found it pretty funny. It did add to my dislike of Kirstin, though.

Going to the same schools and living right down the street from each other, there were plenty of opportunities to rip into me long after I gave up being mean. Terms like "Academic Geek" (Referring to my rather high standing in the Academic Games program while I believe she dropped out after a year) and other general jerkiness became common place in the neighborhood. Her mother was always scheming as well; I just figured it ran in the family.

But fast forward to the present, and here she is with cancer. Everybody's being super nice to her, she gets voted onto homecoming court, and she's got her own "Kick It Kristin!" small business (What other cancer patient do you know with a full line of clothing?). And what has she done to deserve it? Been a jerk for as long as I can remember. Not only that, but people now expect me to have a turnaround about her as well. "You're such a terrible person, Justin!" But why should I? She's never been nice to me or my family, but we're now supposed to forget all that and rally around her? I don't think so. I don't want her to be sick, but I'm not gonna suddenly become her friend and start doing things for her. No way I'm buying a "Kick It Kristin!" bumper sticker for the tank. Nor am I going to go to all these "Support Kristin" events. She's done absolutely nothing to earn my support. Poor Beth has been baking her cookies and who knows what else, and she was meaner to her than she was to me. I guarantee if Beth was the one with cancer, we wouldn't hear a peep out of her or her family. Kristin doesn't deserve to be sick, but she certainly has done nothing to earn extra kindness from me, and certainly none from my sister. I guess that just shows Beth's compassion, though... She's a better person than I.

So I'm back in Weirton. And there was this whole football game and this dance thing. They call it Homecoming. I really don't know anything about it; I've never been to the dance thing, but the football game is OK... I guess they call it Homecoming cause I come home. It's very thoughtful of them.

Saw all the cool kids at the foosball game... And some of the not cool ones. Some young-ins wanted to hook up with me, but Beth scared 'em off... Made me mad! But it was a good demonstration of my skills with the ladies that I always talk about. Some people just don't believe me, but they saw it first hand there. I also successfully initiated the ditching of Reverse Osmosis, since no one else had the balls to. Another ruined trip was not going to happen. And it didn't. Also did some 24 hour Wal-Marting with Beth, Tina, and Sarah with an h. Almost got thrown out... And I certainly didn't deserve it. Oh, and they sell machetes for like $7. But you have to be over 18. Oh wait, I am! Add that to the list!

But yeah, to the dance! Beth went with her fellow liker of boring stuff, P.J. It was so cute... They were probably talking about like the Civil War or something while they were dancing... *Match made in heaven* *Meant to beeeeeeee* But so to relieve my boredom (Especially since no one from my class was in *coughcough*), I was invited to the "after party" at JM's. Lot's of fun... And scariness... Now where's that lap dance pic... *Ahem* I mean there was lots of good, wholesome fun. And certainly no tickling. No tickling whatsoever.

What a football weekend! While WVU stays undefeated (Ignoring the fact that we're playing high school caliber teams), Notre Dame, the team I love to see lose more than any other, did just that; they lost to 11th ranked Michigan.

Oh, what a way to make a weekend... All the Kool-Aid drinkin Notre Dame fans will have to live with the fact that, after losing, Notre Dame will move up to the #1 spot... lmao. Isn't that how it works though? After a long game of making late hits and getting the referees on you side and the announcers singing your praise for 3 1/2 hours, you lose and still hold your ranking steadfast, since the Notre Dame Kool-Aid is distributed nationally for free. Sure, poor little Brady Quinn threw 3 interceptions, but he was just having an off day; let's keep him in the Heisman runnings. I mean, there are 2 Brady Quinn points on the back of every pouch of Fighting Irish Kool-Aid.

I just can't take it! No matter what they do or who they lose to, there's tons of people who just feel that Notre Dame is God's gift to the world, and I can't stand it. They get so much preferential treatment in the college football world, I can't stand it. You know where they are dropping to after this week? Probably 9th. That's my call. 9th. And remember my record when calling things... Very good. But its very surprising to me that they even lost in the first place. Anyone see the game? The referees were so one sided it wasn't even funny. And then out come the rabid fans praising their fatty coach on high... He's got nothing. He didn't build the team, and he certainly didn't help their game; the refs do it for him.

Let this be a lesson to you Notre Dame fans out there: Go get a life.

In today's Public Service Announcement, we will be discussing 2 main principles:

1) The correct term is "digital audio player," not "iPod"

2) Your flash-based MP3 player is a digital audio player, not a fashion accessory


We'll start off with #1. Just because Apple holds (I'm guessing) 80% of the portable-media market doesn't mean it's the only player out there. Or the best. "iPod," unlike other brand names we use regularly, is not representative of the product in general. All tissues, Kleenex or not, are a few plys of paper-product used for blowing ones nose. All "flying disks," frisbee or not, are just plastic saucers companies give out for free. All skates, rollerblades or not, are just shoes with four parallel wheels stuck on the bottom of them. Brand doesn't play much of a difference. But in the digital audio player market, it does. Call my Rio an iPod and you're starting a fight. Does your iPod have gapless? No. Does it have a parametric EQ? No. On-The-Fly (not to be confused with On-The-Go) playlisting? No. Does it have crossfading? Nobody's sure. Does mine play lossy, encoded in Apple's codec from hell music files from iTunes? Oh, I guess it doesn't. I guess it's inferior. I so wish I could purchase music that can only be played in iTunes or on an iPod and no where else. *humph* So don't ask me why my iPod is short and fat, cause you know what answer you'll get? Cause it doesn't drink Steve Job's Kood-Aid.

So what are you allowed to call players of these sorts? Well, the 100% appropriate name would be "Digital Audio Player (DAP)." That's exactly what they are, aren't they? A piece of hardware that plays digital audio. I will admit, though, that "digital audio player" is a mouthful (8 syllables) and that if you say "DAP" to someone, they'll look at you funny, so I'm willing to make a compromise: "MP3 Player." If we examine the market, we'll notice that 99% of the DAPs out there include MP3 support. *Cough*Sony*Cough*ATRAC*Cough* This makes them hardware that plays digital audio encoded to MP3 standards, which once again fits. Pick a favorite here, but take heed: If you ask me about my iPod, keep your hands up. I will hit back. You've been warned.

Now to #2. Hello everybody. You're flash-based MP3 player is not, I repeat, is not a fashion accessory. Wearing it around your neck does not make you cool. It makes you look like a douche and, if you're wearing an iPod Shuffle, lets me know that you are an uninformed consumer. <rant type="quick">The iPod Shuffle is the worst MP3 player ever developed. The principle behind it? You don't need a screen. Why? Cause Stevie J said so. Good Lord. If I'm paying $100 for a 1-GB MP3 player, I sure as hell better have a screen on it to find one of the 240 songs I have stored on it. Oh, and shuffle isn't an earth-shaking feature, Steve. My 6-year-old MP3 player has shuffle. Kool-Aid anyone?</rant> MP3 players are supposed to play music, not dangle from your neck. Arm bands are permitted for athletic reasons, but other than that, I don't want to see it. Keep it in your pocket or bookbag. We know you have one cause we can see your white headphones, so give the muggers a challenge and put it away. Ripping it from your pencil neck is just too easy.

w00t! Justin got his skis this weekend!

I got a ride home from Carrie right after the Marshall game so I could get my butt up to Pittsburgh and subsequently Willi's Ski Sale.

And 500 some dollars later, I left with a pair of skis, bindings, boots, poles, clear goggles (for night skiing! ;) ), and a bank account that doesn't know what hit it.

But do I care? Maybe...

But am I excited! Heck yes!

I got the skis you see to the left. Supposedly they're black (they look it in the picture) but in person they almost have a dark bluish tint. I dunno. They're probably just black. My boots are black and shiny... I'm a little disappointed cause they have a silver stripe down the top, but they were the pair that fit the best, and being the engineer I am, I couldn't rationalize prettiness over comfort. Especially in a ski boot.

Since I was home alone (the family was down in Huntington for Labor Day weekend), I wore my boots all around the house like a loser. Going down the steps was tough, but other than that I was the man. Ate with 'em; played video games with 'em; sang a song out in the front yard with 'em (Don't ask). I couldn't wear my skis, though, since I still have to get the bindings put on them. I'll just have the rents take care of that later, lol.

Problem is, now I wanna go skiing really bad. And it's September. I don't even have a prayer of skiing for another 3 months. So my brand new skis and I are just gonna have to sit around, look at each other, and pretend. Maybe I'll hose down the back yard and go for a spin.

Hey, it could work...

OMG, we ran all over Marshall! Now, I know what you all are saying... "But Justin, I thought you were a Marshall fan!" Well I am. Except when they play WVU. When they play WVU, Marshall becomes the scum of the Earth. The suck. Football peasants in my eyes. Not worthy to play on Mountaineer Field. May their quarterback be sacked and their defense jump offside. Yes, I shouted "Kill him!" multiple times. Sadly (Luckily?), though, there was no need for the 3rd down chant. We'll be saving it up for more important games (Louisville?).

But a lot of people down here in Morgantown were hatin' on the Marshall game, and I just don't know why. I may be a little biased, but if you're gonna whine about a game, why not try Eastern Washington next week. Marshall would smear them just as bad as we will. Might as well start the second string... But anyway, this game was definitely the one I looked forward to the most this year, and while Marshall didn't bring as much game as I had hoped, I'm still happy with the result.

On the exciting Justin news front, I have taken my second trip to a bar since starting school at Morgantown, and this time I didn't sit in the corner drinking a Sprite. This time I sat at a table with my Sprite. With food too. And I wasn't by myself. Leaps and bounds, I tell you! Leaps and bounds. Twas the same skanky bar as last time (Mario's Fishbowl), but since I'm there so often, I'm starting to get used to it. It was more fun this time... Notice the lack of hatin' on this post compared to the last one. Now if I made some friends 25 years older than me, we could hang out there all the time...

Man, I need to get out more.